So I was roaming the internet, trying to find something to amuse myself with, when I stumbled upon a quite ineteresting guy. To me he's a youtuber, successfull that is, and a really nice guy. He's not alien, and for some reason I do recognize a lot of things in him from myself.
Now, the reason to why I make this post is that in one of his videos (or actually cuite a few, but whatever), there is this wall behind him. It's like that wall where you like put all the important stuff that has happened in your life. Things such as your favorite musicians, a crush from your childhood, awesome films and game posters! It's the wall of memories. And I realised, when looking to my own wall behind me, that I doesn't have one.
Don't get me wrong, I've done things and experienced stuff, but I can't get away from this feeling that I'm still way behind. It's that... when I look at that wall, it's just plain gray-green, staring back at me with no signs of being a room of a living human being. A young guy, alive and supposed to have built a life filled with something worth mentioning. But there's just nothing. It's empty.
It's like when you think "I'll do that tomorrow" about your homework, except this is my actual life! Why do I postphone it? What am I waiting for and why am I so damn afraid of just getting out there and start living?
So yeah, that wall. It's the one telling me to forget about such uncomfortable feelings and just lay down in the bed right next to it, to wake up in another hopefully but doubtfully better tomorrow.
I'm sorry, but I don't feel like uploading anything creative or even... anything. At the moment. I'm now going to succumb to this tiering feeling of nothingness and sleep a good long night and hopefully wake up well rested and ready for the world. My expectations arn't that high, though...
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